Showing Up: June 2020 Recap
This month was heavy for more reasons than I can list, and while the US has started opening up and returning to some semblance of normalcy, I think we've all felt the heaviness to a point. There have been so many unexpected things come up this month--some good, some scary or painful or full of grief--and I have found myself describing my relationship with God as just showing up. I am so overwhelmed by the hurt in the world and the pain those around me are experiencing. I am so struck by the injustices caused by sin. I am so full of uncertainty about circumstances and the future that I'm not even sure how to pray. Rather than beat myself up about that, I have felt permission from the Father to just be with Him. I just sit and listen and wait if He wants to say something, or I cry out what needs to be released. And that is enough. No fancy words. No covering all of the angles or feeling like I have to strive to be heard or understood. Just being together, weeping together, and receiving His strength and His perspective.
What I Ate:1) Mediterranean Feast with Garlic Naan. This meal was really special. I am a huge fan of different sauces, and this was a perfect meal to try new sauces. I used a recipe for garlic naan that my sister had made before because it seemed a bit more accessible than making pita bread. It did not disappoint. Here is that recipe: https://www.chefdehome.com/recipes/596/homemade-no-yeast-garlic-butter-naan
Photo by Samir Biscevic
Nadiya Hussain-Inspired Falafel. This is a recipe that I saw on Nadiya's Time to Eat, but we tweaked it a bit. She uses baked beans to make her falafel, and we used canned white beans. We also didn't make the sauce or slaw. Here is that recipe: https://thehappyfoodie.co.uk/recipes/nadiya-hussains-baked-bean-falafel We baked them. I think they probably would've been better in terms of crispiness if we would've fried them. Still good though.
Romesco Sauce. I could eat this stuff with a spoon. There are a lot of variations out there. I roasted red peppers and tomatoes then blended those with sun-dried tomatoes, roasted almonds, garlic, paprika, olive oil, salt, cayenne pepper, vinegar, and parsley. Here is a recipe for reference: https://cookieandkate.com/easy-romesco-sauce-recipe/
Hummus. I don't have this recipe since it was a friend's, but it was delicious. It's also a standard to eat with falafel.
Zhoug Sauce. This sauce is similar to a chimichurri with a bit more kick and some surprising flavors. Here are some recipes for reference: https://cookieandkate.com/zhoug-sauce-recipe/ and https://www.feastingathome.com/zhoug-recipe/
Tzatziki Sauce.This sauce was another favorite. It was so delicious and refreshing. It's really important to drain the cucumbers; otherwise, your sauce will be too watery. I didn't have Greek yogurt, so I just used regular. Here are some recipes for reference: https://cookieandkate.com/how-to-make-tzatziki/ and https://www.themediterraneandish.com/tzatziki-sauce-recipe/
Photo by Timokefoto
Chicken Veggie Kebabs. To have something else to dip in the sauces, we also made some simple chicken kebabs with onion, bell pepper, and cherry tomatoes. I just seasoned the chicken with some lime juice, salt, pepper, and olive oil.
2) New York Times Creamy White Bean and Fennel Casserole. This recipe was unexpected and something entirely new. I really liked it. I added sliced chorizo to make it a bit more substantial. I only had one fennel bulb, and I also swapped Parmesan cheese for mozzarella because it's what I had. Here is the recipe: https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1020083-creamy-white-bean-and-fennel-casserole
Photo by Charles Deluvio
3) Butter Chicken. Following the Indian food theme with naan, I also made butter chicken using this recipe: https://cafedelites.com/butter-chicken/ The only thing I didn't have were the fenugreek seeds. Still good without it.
4) Hibachi Chicken and Veggies with Fried Rice and Ginger Sauce. This meal came about because of a rare sighting of Yum Yum Sauce in a supermarket. Turns out, the ginger sauce was actually better. We made our chicken and veggies with some olive oil, lime juice, soy sauce, and teriyaki sauce. (There was a slight mix-up of bottles and some Worcestershire sauce was also added in, but it certainly didn't hurt anything.) Our rice was fried with some butter, soy sauce, green onion, and garlic. For the ginger sauce, I blended green onion, garlic, grated ginger, lime juice, soy sauce, rice vinegar, and a little bit of sugar.
Photo by Santiago Conteras Hernandez
5) Chicken Pozole with Chimichurri Sauce. I had this recipe in mind before I was able to find canned hominy at the store. I have been eating off of it for days, and I'm still not bored. It's got a kick, and the chimichurri is really what makes it something special. Here are the recipes I used for reference for the soup: https://www.cookingclassy.com/chicken-posole/ and https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/155184/easy-chicken-posole/
I used a whole chicken I had roasted beforehand and included some tomato and cabbage in the soup. Here are some references for the chimichurri sauce: https://cafedelites.com/authentic-chimichurri-uruguay-argentina/ and https://www.cookingclassy.com/chimichurri/
I didn't have red wine vinegar, so I just used whatever vinegar I had on hand. I also used lime juice. I also didn't have red chilies, so I used red pepper flakes. I also used some red onion and only included parsley instead of cilantro since the soup already a lot of cilantro added.
What I Read:
From Amazon
1) Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone by J. K. Rowling.
From Amazon
2) Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets by J. K. Rowling.
From Amazon
3) Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban by J. K. Rowling.
I had never read the Harry Potter books before. I know that there are a lot of camps that may have opinions about reading these books. For some, it's a travesty that I haven't read them until now especially given that I grew up in the era of their greatest popularity. Others would disagree with reading them because of their references to magic that challenge theology. And others may be against reading them because of recent controversy surrounding J. K. Rowling. I'm not really looking for a debate from any angle. Reading the Harry Potter series wasn't really on my bucket list, but one of my regular students is obsessed with these books and the movies. That's all he wanted to talk about. And, I had just started a free Kindle trial that had all of them for free to read. So, in the interest of connecting with my student and seeing what the fuss was about, I started reading them. And, while I'm not done the series, I can say that I really appreciate the twist endings and the world J. K. Rowling has created. They are the kind of books that once the story gets going, I can't put down. So far, I can't really pick a favorite, and I like how they all build so well together. It's not lost on me what a luxury it is that I can binge these in a short span when my peers had to wait until each subsequent one came out when they were being written. Here is one of my favorite quotes from the first book:
"Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself." - Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
From Amazon
2) I'd Rather Be Reading by Anne Bogel. This is a book about the nuances of reading, and I loved it. I loved how she talks about the fear of being too known too quickly by answering the question "What are your favorite books?" I loved reading about her relationship with her local library and the dilemma of how to organize one's own book shelves. It's the kind of book that will feel like home to anyone who loves to read and has long considered books to be their friends. I am just such a person, so this book was warm and sweet and comforting. I highly recommend it.
From Amazon
5) 12 "Christian" Beliefs That Can Drive You Crazy: Relief from False Assumptions by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. One of the things I love about Cloud and Townsend is that they're always challenging Christians to dig deeper and ask good questions rather than simply accepting everything at face value. This book examines many of the cliches and common interpretations of Biblical principles that actually serve to hinder our growth and relationship with God, however well-meaning they may start out being. Many of these I had considered before, but I love the language that Cloud and Townsend provide to able to talk about these issues with other believers using wisdom. Here are some quotes that got noted in my journal:
"One of the most spiritual activities you can perform is to need other people."
"Since there's no condemnation in Christ Jesus, we are never alienated from love in all our overreactions and errors and outright sins."
"People who are disconnected and estranged from each other have a more difficult time knowing and being close to God. We see this continually in clinical practice, especially among Christians who can't sense any closeness to God after years of functional Gnosticism and sufficiency teachings. Only after they've worked on connecting to healthy people do they gradually begin sensing God more."
What I Watched:
1) Somebody Feed Phil. This month was a lot--am-i-right, or am-i-right? This show was a delightful respite in the midst of so much heaviness. Phil is witty but also so personable and kind to the people he shares a table with. He gets so outwardly excited about food that I feel included in his joy even though I'm tasting nothing. In season three, he goes to Marrakesh, Chicago, London, Seoul, and Montreal. I love the guests he included, and that he seeks out a variety of eating experiences. It's comfort food in television form.
2) Just Mercy. For the month of June, this movie has been free on Amazon Prime. This was the last movie I had wanted to see in theaters but didn't get to before all of this craziness started. As always, Michael B. Jordan gives a caring and charismatic performance, and the story is based on real life events that are well-worth your time in Googling. It follows the story of a young lawyer as he tries to help inmates who are on death row get a chance at justice when they've been falsely accused or their case was mishandled. There are so many thoughts that I was still processing days after watching this movie, and they are thoughts worth grappling with. I have long been against the death penalty, but this movie only strengthened that resolve. I would highly recommend watching this movie if only to see the justice system from someone else's perspective.
3) Top Chef. As my recommendations from the last three months and my growing waistline would indicate, when I am confronted with a lot of heavy emotions, the creativity of food is one of my favorite escapes. This show is not like Somebody Feed Phil. I had never watched it before, but it is a cutthroat cooking competition with a lot of creative and fun challenges. Netflix here only has the first two seasons, but those seasons from 2006 or so were like a fun time capsule. I enjoyed seeing the early 2000s attire and flip phones almost as much as I enjoyed the impeccable-looking dishes. Reality show drama is not my jam, so I was really just here for the food.
Favorites:
1) My dog, Rocky. We just passed 100 days of being on lockdown. We're still only allowed out once a week or once every two weeks, so my life is totally confined to my house other than the occasional walk in my neighborhood and the allotted grocery run (that involves looooonnnggg lines). My faithful friend throughout all of this has been Rocky. As a Doberman mix, he has always been very affectionate and demanding of attention. That has only increased during this time of quarantine. If I even just switch seats in the living room, he gets up and follows me to lay at my feet. He's always up for a walk to explore, and he just makes life better.
Playlist for the Month:Here is the link: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLERDDFsw5e_ooQoTkVNEfAzi3qgkMqyec
1) "The Real Jesus" - downhere
2) "Bet All I Have/Solid Rock" - Mission House
3) "Such an Awesome God" - TRIBL
4) "Set a Fire" - Legacy Nashville Prayer Room
5) "Where I Belong" - Cory and Anna Asbury
6) "Lean Back" - Legacy Prayer Room
7) "The God Who Sees" - Nicole C. Mullen
8) "Innocent Lives" - Common Hymnal
9) "This Is Me" - Jona
10) "Let Praises Rise" - Maranda Curtis
11) "Famous For (I Believe)/Do It Again" - Tauren Wells featuring Christine D'Clario and Jenn Johnson.
12) "Strong God" - Kirk Franklin
13) "My World Needs You" - Kirk Franklin featuring Tamela Mann, Tasha Cobbs, and Sarah Reeves
My prayer for us all is that we'll keep showing up--to fight injustice even if we don't know all of the complex solutions, to ask the hard questions we may never have answers for, and to just be with the One who is enough even when we aren't. May we dig deep in loving others and in seeking growth. May we embrace exactly where we are rather than sticking our heads in the sand. We are here for such a time as this. We can't receive what we need to move forward until we own where we are. May we not shy away from the strong emotions of others or of ourselves because when we are overwhelmed, we can either run to God or away from Him. He can handle our wordless cries for help, our angry questions, and our struggles to have hope. I may not always come away with clear-cut answers, but when I sit with Him, I know I'm not alone.
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