Doing the Best We Can: March 2021 Recap
Photo by Estudio Bloom
I've been reading Brené Brown's book Rising Strong for a while. It has so much wisdom and parts that need digested that it's taking me a while to finish it. One of the things that I have found so helpful from her book has been the idea of choosing to believe that people are doing the best they can. She has a whole wrestling with that concept that she details in the book, but after researching extensively through many interviews, she determines that for the most part, people are doing the best they can...and when we try to dig in our heels and refuse to believe that, we end up judging people who are likely in need of grace just as much as we are. This is a concept that has impacted me a lot (obviously, since I also wrote about it in my last missionary update), but I think it's also a helpful concept for extending grace to ourselves. This past month required some endurance. It was a combination of so many things. Sometimes, it can feel like your own body is against you from dragging energy levels to inexplicable skin flare ups, from those weird chest pains from childhood to a bout with insomnia. Other times, it's in desperately trying to find the motivation to generate some new habits but finding yourself coming up short time and time again. Too many things on the to do list that aren't getting crossed off. Too many unresolved questions about the future that are taking up mental real estate. At times, we can try so hard to connect with those we care about but find ourselves failing miserably. Other times, it's as simple as demanding schedules keeping you from some restorative quality time with your significant other. Maybe there's an old emotional wound or sore spot that, try as we might, we can't seem to fully remedy and move on from. Rather than harping on all of those shortcomings or disappointments, rather than trying to will my body to have energy and be 100% healthy and stress-free, I have been trying to tell myself the same thing I want to tell myself about others: "You're doing the best you can." We have limitations for a reason. We don't have to earn a restful breath or earn relationship with God. We don't have to dwell in a mindset of punishment; we can choose to take a step into freely given grace. Tomorrow is a new day with fresh mercies already rising to meet us.
What I Read:
1) Cozy Minimalist Home: More Style, Less Stuff by Myquillyn Smith. The COVID era has us spending more time at home, and our walls sustained some water damage in the form of chipping and shedding paint due to our hefty rainy and hurricane season. So, I've been thinking about painting and reconsidering our home little by little. I'm all for a spruce on a shoestring budget. This book was a fun way of getting those creative juices flowing. I don't know that my style totally coincides with Myquillyn Smith's but what I really love about this book is how practical it is. It covers the value of temporary fixes and takes a shoestring budget into account. Even more so, it helps you to consider the order of how you decorate a room. If you're into design or re-doing anything in your house, it's worth checking out. This quote resonated with me, and I reiterated it loudly to my stuff-collecting husband:
"Recent scientific research has shown that the level of cortisol--a stress-response hormone--rises in women when we are faced with excess stuff in our homes."
2) The Path between Us: An Enneagram Journey to Healthy Relationships by Suzanne Stabile. If you're a fan of the Enneagram or read The Road Back to You, this book is a great follow up. It delves into each number, but it also observes how each number connects with other numbers or what could be possible issues or points of view to keep in mind when communicating with or relating to other numbers.
3) Magnolia Table Volume 2: A Collection of Recipes for Gathering by Joanna Gaines. The unique aspect of Joanna Gaines' recipes and cooking style is how she seems able to bring together many elements of different generations' attitudes toward cooking. When I was growing up, casseroles and convenient ingredients that were frozen or canned were pretty normal. I have found that many of my peers, especially those of us in Honduras who don't have the luxury of many prepared/frozen/canned foods, tend to shy away from casseroles in favor of fresh fruits and vegetables and items from scratch. Joanna does a little of both. This was a library loan, so I didn't have a lot of time to make many of the recipes. But I did make her honey garlic chicken with pineapple. In my book, it was all right, but Raul really loved it.
4) A Fatal Grace by Louise Penny. This was the second Louise Penny and Inspector Gamache mystery that I have read. The crime in this one was quite eccentric, but the characters and little town of Three Pines were just as charming as they were in the first book. This book brings an outsider to Three Pines. She has an unfavorable reputation and a curiously bizarre family, and she is also murdered in a near inexplicable way. Once again, Inspector Gamache finds himself digging into the history and dynamics of Three Pines with him team to solve the case. What I am finding to be very interesting about this second book in the series is how an overarching mystery is being introduced and developed; it involves one of Gamache's past cases. I am eager to continue to read the series to find out what happens.
What I Watched:
1) New Amsterdam. This show recently became available on Netflix in Honduras, and I loved it. It follows Max as he becomes the director of America's oldest public hospital. He's idealistic and creative about trouble-shooting. While his approach is sometimes lacking in boundaries or short-sighted by optimism, his enduring positivity and determination becomes inspiring to the doctors he oversees and soon becomes friends with. I had already seen an episode with my parents when I was in the US, but I enjoyed watching the first two seasons. I miss network television mainly because so much of what is on streaming services tends to be much more heavy on grit and cussing than the things I grew up watching since there's no regulation. This show is dramatic but feels hopeful and wholesome. I genuinely cared about the characters and their chemistry with one another. It's also really fascinating to me the inclusion of the counseling/psychiatry aspect of the hospital through the character of Iggy since that aspect often gets overlooked in other medical shows.
2) Tiny House Nation. I'm fascinated by tiny houses. If I weren't married, I think I could probably gladly live in a tiny house hovel. As an introvert married to an extrovert, it would be a real rough ride trying to live in such a small space with my volume and fast-speed-loving husband. The format and hosts sometimes make the show feel cutesy and forced, and I'm sure there is a lot of scripted staging going on. But, the houses are so cool, and each one is different. It's really interesting to see how they come up with unique furniture and storage troubleshooting to adapt the tiny houses for each family's need.
3) Operation Varsity Blues: The College Admissions Scandal. This documentary covers the huge FBI bust of wealthy parents who worked with Rick Singer to get their children into exclusive schools via niche sport loopholes and sketchy donations. This documentary delves into not only how the FBI gathered evidence and rounded up their suspects but also into the questionable culture surrounding college admission. It's a sobering peek into a facet of the US that isn't often explored with a critical eye.
What I Ate:
Photo by Bernadette Wurzinger
1) Chicken Pesto Soup. This list of recipes subtly swings the gamut of winter comfort foods to suddenly summer since that's kind of how our seasons work here in Honduras (at least in my neck of the woods). We go from the briskest, chilliest temps that occur in Honduras to needing to sit in front of a fan pretty quickly. This soup was really simple but very good. The most complicated thing about this recipe is cooking chicken and making pesto. An oven or crock pot and a food processor are quick solutions for those things. An addition of onions and carrots certainly doesn't hurt, but it's not a must. Adding garlic should be a no-brainer. Here is the recipe I used as a reference:
https://www.gimmesomeoven.com/5-ingredient-pesto-chicken-soup-recipe/
2) Beans and Mustard Greens. Sometimes my husband's clients drive vegetable trucks and randomly gift him things. So, when he came home with a huge bunch of mustard greens, this food was in order. We ate off of it for several days with no complaints. I pretty closely followed the recipe below except that we used red beans rather than cannellini beans. I highly recommend adding some cheese of your choice when serving.
https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/218498/mustard-greens-n-beans/
3) Chicken Mushroom Spinach Lasagna. This recipe was a big hit with my husband, and mushrooms aren't even his favorite. He had several helpings in one sitting. This recipe is its own unique entity, and the sauce is a white sauce--a perfect option for people who love the comfort of lasagna but can't eat tomatoes. I used fresh basil instead of dried basil but stuck to the recipe for the most part otherwise.
https://www.littlebroken.com/chicken-mushroom-and-spinach-lasagna/
Photo by Monika Grabkowska
4) Cherry Chocolate Chip Scones. Cherries are a rarity in Honduras, and when they do show their faces, they're usually so sad looking and overpriced that I never buy them. However, the Honduran version of Costco had packages of cherries that looked great and at a price that didn't cause intense guilt. Thus, we bought some and ate plenty of them fresh. With a bit left over, I chopped them up to make these scones. These were really good. The below is the recipe I followed. It's a basic scone recipe. If you scroll down it will give you the measurements for adding chocolate chips and cherries.
https://sallysbakingaddiction.com/scones-recipe/
5) Mojito Scones. These scones were also good though less sweet. I didn't have lime oil, so I added lime juice. These are good on their own. They were also good with a thin layer of mango jam on top.
https://www.kingarthurbaking.com/recipes/mojito-scones-recipe
Photo by Dhaya Eddine Bentaleb
6) Mandarin Orange Chicken Salad. As a kid, Applebee's was a popular chain restaurant to frequent. Now, it seems, lesser so. All that to say, one of the things I most remember eating at Applebee's was their Oriental Chicken Salad. The salad I made was not really a replica as I didn't bread and fry the chicken (nobody wants to mess with frying when it's hot outside). I also didn't try to replicate the dressing. Mine was a simple amalgamation of leaf lettuce, chopped purple cabbage, chopped baked chicken breast, almonds, and canned mandarin oranges. The dressing consisted of fresh, grated ginger, rice vinegar, sesame oil, Dijon mustard (though you could get away with skipping this), honey, olive oil, salt, and pepper. I could eat it over and over without getting bored of it.
Favorites:
1) The Lazy Genius Podcast. I love anything that challenges me to think in a new way or gives me tips for living a more efficient, practical, and enjoyable life. Kendra Adachi, the Lazy Genius herself, does just that. Several authors whose work I enjoy as well as some other podcasts I listen to recommended this podcast, and I finally got around to seeing what the fuss was about. Kendra covers widespread topics with fresh eyes and down-to-earth but truly lightbulb-coming-on wisdom. Cooking chicken, loving people you disagree with, planning a girls night, and working from home are all sample topics she delves into. I loosely started by looking at the beginning of her podcast episodes. It took her a bit to find her stride, so some of the very early, interview-focused episodes feel long though they're also fun. I would recommend listening to when her format shortens a bit since she seems to have hit her own niche and rhythm around then. Thus far, I haven't been dissatisfied with any of her content though. She also has a book that is currently on my to-be-read list.
As spring begins to peep through with buds on the trees and sunshine through the clouds, I pray grace will also break in on us like light through a clean window. The expectation isn't perfection. It's just doing our best. So may you find new shades of God's grace adorning your life, and may you find comfort in your home rather than demands. May we all find contentment with less, and breathe freely more. May we keep fighting to connect well and to say we're sorry when we fall short. May we ask others how we can help and also give ourselves the grace that it's okay for us to need help as well. May we make time to mentally, spiritually, and emotionally enter into the grace God always offers us even and especially when we're fighting to feel like we are enough.
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