Fall Feelings

Photo by Valentin Sabau


I have wanted to sit down and take a moment to acknowledge and celebrate the impending season of fall for quite a while because it makes me giddy with excitement. But, let’s be honest, it’s hard to feel excited about fall when you’re sitting in front of a fan in your skivvies because it’s crazy hot outside. Nevertheless, I am coming to understand that fall isn’t just a season but also a feeling. A lot of those feelings can be elusive living in Honduras because of the environment around me in which the leaves don’t change, and the closest we get to autumn weather is the cool the rainy season brings (following scorching temperatures and building humidity). However, I have ample memories to draw from, and living somewhere without an outward fall makes my autumn feelings seem like an internal secret that only a handful of us share. It’s why we missionaries decorate our homes with harvest themes this time of year even though we have no pumpkins. It’s why I find myself upping my hot tea intake and lighting my apple cider and pumpkin spice and green forest and maple pancakes candles. In short, it’s a sense of coziness and safe haven. There is nothing quite like curling up under a fuzzy blanket as it’s snowing outside or walking off of your porch with the crisp air nipping at your face. It’s a beautiful thing to be able to hide yourself in warmth and feel the comfort of protection from the elements.



Photo by Aaron Burden


Part of the beauty of fall is the togetherness. That can be as subtle as sitting in the same room together reading, or it can be propping up on one another to watch a movie. Fall is about settling in and hunkering down. The school year is beginning, so it’s not all about comfort. There are fresh challenges on the horizon that feel just as exhilarating as that autumn air. In the midst of so many things to run to—classes and sports games, meetings and gatherings—the world around us beckons us to stillness. We can cling like those leaves to tips of the branches until it’s time to be launched forward, displaying our colors for all to see. We simultaneously dazzle as one of a kind even as our part in the whole blends into mere blotches of red, yellow, and orange. Landscapes worth traveling far and wide to see.




I haven’t been in the US to experience true fall since I moved to Honduras eight years ago. But every year, I celebrate its coming like a faithful friend who sends me postcards. My grandmother and my mom send me pictures of leaves. It’s never the same, but that’s part of the togetherness. It’s participating in wonder together however possible. Autumn has always been a mixture of rest and reward in the midst of some final laps of exertion. And, like clockwork, there are certain things that transport me to a land of seeing my breath in the air, cheering on my alma mater at football games, walking through crunchy leaves, picking out the perfect pumpkin, and adding another layer to my outfit. Here are some of my favorites:



Photo by Daiga Ellaby


Movies and TV Shows:

Gilmore Girls – I didn’t realize that this was a habit until this year, but every September, I crave the Gilmore Girls. Maybe it’s because Rory is so studious and there are so many school years to start. Maybe it’s the quaintness of Stars Hollow that reminds me of where I grew up. Either way, it’s how I always start my autumn feeling.

You’ve Got Mail – Immediately following is this movie—one of my all-time favorites, dated though it may be. “Don’t you love New York in the fall? It makes me want to buy school supplies. I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils if I knew your name and address.” Need I say more really? No one does charming like Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. And, yes, it makes me want to buy school supplies too.


Photo by Allie Smith


Some other wonderful movies that give me autumn inspirations are:

When Harry Met Sally
Stepmom
The Village
Remember the Titans
Away We Go
Runaway Bride



Music:


I have a tendency to want to listen to oldies during this season. I think it’s related to the overall nostalgia of the time, but there are a few others that feel like fall to me that aren’t oldies. I also tend to lean into folksy music that reminds me of bonfires and music concerts at the Purple Fiddle in Thomas, West Virginia. Some of these are also courtesy of movie soundtracks. It’s an eclectic playlist. Take a listen if you like: 
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLERDDFsw5e_pavd_ZRIOEagWTiLIJ4AQf


Joy and Wonder:
This is also the perfect time of year to wander into a book store and spend hours. Used book stores offer so much character and the possibility of serendipitous finds. Yet who can resist the smell of a new book either? Sitting in coffee shops when it’s raining outside is also delightful. And, if I were in a place where the leaves were changing, I’d be sure to walk about a quaint Main Street of a charming small town, poking my head into little shops and then getting off of the beaten path into nature. If summer is for hammocks, autumn is for benches.


Photo by Aaron Burden

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the joy fall foods bring. Around this time every year, I’m digging out my homemade chai recipe and firing up the slow cooker to make some apple cider from scratch. Those inspirations haven’t hit fully yet, but did I mention it’s been insanely hot? Autumn is also the time for soups of all kinds—a smooth butternut squash soup, a savory beef stew, a tart and heated gazpacho with cheese crackers courtesy of Grandmom, chicken and dumplings—you name it. Bring on the roasted Brussels sprouts and my mom’s pumpkin bread with chocolate chips! Pecan tarts from my Nannie and Raúl’s favorite—chili.



Photo by Monika Grabkowska

There is a special kind of love from God in autumn. He shows Himself as warmth and a hiding place. He wraps His arms around us in sweaters and fuzzy blankets. He shows us His faithfulness and creativity in the leaves. He challenges us with new, crisp beginnings even as seasons are changing, and it’s time to hunker down. He walks with us on sunlit roadways. He sips tea by our sides. In the same way that we delight in fall, He delights in us.



Photo by Alexander McFeron

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