"Be Kind to Yourself" [July Recap}


As I write this, I am back in Honduras following a month of more loving people, delicious food, and hours of travel than I ever would've expected to fill just a month. And, all of this culminated with tough goodbyes and some strong emotions upon returning. So, last week, when processing seemed out of reach in terms of emotional stamina, and time was slipping through my fingers, I decided to be kind to myself and give myself a break. And, I've had to carry that little mantra in mind as I've returned to Honduras. Too tired to scrub down my house today? Be kind to yourself. Rest and take it a little at a time. Too overwhelmed to face the traffic and get groceries? Be kind to yourself and wait till the crowds thin out. Give yourself the space to feel what you need to feel, process what you need to process, and ease back into Honduran life. As your summer is winding down, I hope that you will also be kind to yourself. Take the time to just be with your family. Actually enjoy doing nothing even if only for a half an hour. Be intentional in putting all religious striving and betterment of your character aside and just let yourself receive God's love for a bit. And don't forget to be thankful just as I am for these things:

What I Ate:
1) My aunt's Thai food on the 4th of July. I think it's one of the most truly American things one can do to eat delicious food from another country on Independence Day. It's not typical, but the US is an amalgamation of so many things--where's the harm in honoring that? Are there that many places in the world where you can find a little bit of everything? I'm perhaps not well-traveled enough to know. But apart from those wonders, my aunt's a great cook, and while I don't know the name of what she cooked, I certainly enjoyed it along with a cold Thai tea. Raúl had thirds. It was a delight to be able to spend the 4th with family and such kind hospitality.

2) T-bone steaks and fresh peach cobbler from our sweet South Carolina friends. No one spoils with good cooking and genuine love like our South Carolina friends. We loved spending time with them, playing with their son, watching episodes of Arrow, and eating some food just full of love. We love them, and we felt so loved by them. And they're wonderful ability to grill and bake and cook certainly didn't hurt. I can think of no one better to have given Raúl the best taste of the South.


Photo by Don Marciano

3) Tortilla Soup. While I didn't have a ton of time at home this past month, when I did, we tried to make it count in making some better than average dinners. This soup was one of them. We made ours with shredded chicken breast, and we used this recipe for inspiration: https://ohsweetbasil.com/the-best-chicken-tortilla-soup-i-ever-made-recipe/
We blended the sauteed carrots, celery, and onions, and we also used an Insta-Pot because we were pressed for time. It turned out to be lovely, and as usual, it's all about the good toppings: sour cream (makes a huge difference), fried tortilla strips, pico de gallo, pickled jalapeños, shredded cabbage, shredded cheese, etc. 

4) My Uncle Bubba's deer tenderloins. Boy, did Raúl and I feel privileged when my uncle and aunt offered to grill out with some of their very own deer steaks. Everyone contributed a little something, and we had a true summer barbecue. As someone who grew up eating venison, I miss it when I'm in Honduras, and these steaks were delicious.


Photo by HBH Media

5) Fried green tomatoes. My small contribution to this barbecue was fried green tomatoes. My uncle grew them, my grandmother sliced them thickly, and I set to work. First, I salted and peppered them before battering them in flour, then beaten egg, then panko. I fried up probably about six or seven decently-sized tomatoes, and let me tell you--there were no leftovers. Even my brother, who typically hates tomatoes, loved them. They taste like summer to me.

6) Korean bibimbop in New York. I love trying new foods, so when I was planning our NYC itinerary, I was excited to include Koreatown, since I'd never been there before. I don't have a lot of experience with Korean food, but I want to. While I was sorry I hadn't talked to my former roommate who has lived in South Korea for a long time now (to know what to order), this dish was a good start. We stopped at a food court that had unending options (so it seemed), and this is what I picked. It was light since it was full of vegetables and chicken. But it was also flavorful with the addition of kimchi and a kind of spicy sauce. It also had a soft egg on top. This won't be my last experience with Korean food!

7) Tzatziki sauce. One of my favorite things about being in my US home for the summer is the gardening and the fruits thereof. My dad has rows and rows of corn, squash, zucchini, onions, tomatoes, and cucumbers. So. Many. Cucumbers. So, in an effort to use up some of those cucumbers, we made tzatziki sauce. We made some rice and some meatballs and topped that simple meal with tzatziki sauce, which made it something special. Tzatziki sauce is often associated with gyros and Greek food, and it's simple to make. Here is a recipe for reference:  https://cookieandkate.com/how-to-make-tzatziki/ We made ours with mint, but having dill would have made it even better.

What I Watched:
1) Stranger Things Season 3. Raúl and I were excited when we found out that Stranger Things season 3 would be coming out while we were in the US because it meant we could watch it with my family. Buuuutt, we were traveling when it came out, and my family binge watched it in a weekend. But they did watch it again with us later. Without giving anything away, I'll second what the child actors all said in preparation for this season--it was bigger, more epic, and had more intensity. But, it was still playful enough to keep you invested in the characters. Now to wait at least another year to know what happens next. If you don't know what Stranger Things is about, it's about a small Indiana town that starts experiencing some strange occurrences, and it's set in the eighties. The show revolves around a group of young characters and their families for the most part. It's nostalgic and funny but also has elements of sci-fi and mystery.

2) Spiderman: Far from Home. After the closure of Avengers: End Game, my family and I were eager to see how the MCU would finish up this phase of stories. The movie picks up after the events of Endgame and explore how the average people were affected by the events of both Endgame and Infinity War. It was special to get to see the evolution of Tom Holland's Spiderman as he navigates the emotions of loss and his changes in identity. Jake Gyllenhaal was charming and cunning as Mysterio, and true to MCU form, the end credits scene raised lots of questions as to what will happen next. Overall, it was a feel-good way to wrap up a saga of beloved characters.

3) ER. Back in the day, ER was my mom's favorite show. Given that she's a nurse, she was fascinated by the medical authenticity, and my default, I grew up on Dr. Mark Greene, Nurse Carol Hathaway, and the myriad of characters who followed in their extensive run. Thus, while some of their seasons were better than others, this show is television comfort food for me. It feels familiar and nostalgic, and the music keeps you hanging in the balance in the midst of the characters' own emergencies.

4) Breathe. This was a random movie that I watched on the plane ride back to Honduras mainly just because I like Claire Foy and Andrew Garfield. It was a pleasant and educating surprise. The story follows the real life of Robin Cavendish and how his life and the life of his wife, Diana, change after he gets polio at a young age. It was inspiring to see how her loyalty and persistence created hope for him and led to as wonderful a quality of life as could be expected. And, he, in turn, begins to creatively think of ways to be more mobile despite his ongoing need for a respirator. He soon becomes an activist for other severely disabled individuals so that they too could have more quality of life. The movie was produced by Robin's actual son, Jonathan. The ending is tragic, but also true to how life played out. It is worth the watch.

What I Read:

Image result for 8 keys to kingdom resources shawn bolz
From amazon.com

1) 8 Keys to Kingdom Resources by Shawn Bolz. This book is a very short read, but it has a lot of good perspectives and simple principles to apply to life. As Christians, we can tend to want to over-spiritualize resources, and in some cases, knock the importance of hard work and good administration. This book is a good balance of emphasizing what it means to live a life in practical obedience to God's will while also understanding that God isn't poverty-minded. He is the most original, creative, and intelligent being out there--as such, we as His followers should reflect those qualities as well. Here is a short excerpt:

"God wants you to steward great resources more than you want to."

Image result for god will make a way cloud and townsend
From amazon.com

2) God Will Make a Way: What to Do When You Don't Know What to Do by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend.
This book--title and all--was just appropriate for where I am in life. The book starts out by talking about some basic principles for seeking out God's will in our lives, things like a relationship with God, valuing wisdom, choosing to be around safe and encouraging people, etc. The book then addresses specific areas where someone might be searching for God's way in the midst of a storm--divorce and marriage, child rearing, addiction, weight loss, and personal goals to name a few. As always, Cloud and Townsend are lovingly straightforward and have plenty of wisdom and helpful anecdotal examples to provide. Here are some parts that made it into my journal:

"It's a proven fact that the work of solving a problem is secondary to getting your team together."
"Welcome as traveling companions people who are pursuing God and his way for them, because they are constantly growing. They will help keep you on the way that God has made for you. Do not entrust your heart to those who are stagnant or doing things that destroy love, life, and accomplishment. They can kill your dreams and turn you away from God's way."
"Dreams that come from God . . . are never based in wrong or selfish motives. Only if they're based in good motives are they truly God's dreams for us, and in that case we can count on him to make a way for them to come to fruition."

"The bedrock truth is, God will make a way for us to the extent that we make a way for him."

Image result for when helping hurts corbett and fikkert
From amazon.com

3) When Helping Hurts: How to Alleviate Poverty without Hurting the Poor...and Yourself by Steve Corbett and Brian Fikkert. As I have alluded to in previous blog posts, this book has been a game changer for me. I don't know that it has all of the answers that I was seeking in this season of ministry, but it was a highly-recommended (by other missionaries) and long-overdue read for me. I'm someone who has tried lots of different ways of helping others and has reached lots of questions of "Is this actually helping long-term?" And, this book answers that question while also providing some practical solutions for what healthy helping can look like. It is a bit technical and is a book that needs digested and revisited. But it has started a lot of vital thinking and evaluation in terms of how I do ministry moving forward. For anyone who helps anyone else in any capacity, I'd recommend it. Here are some parts that resonated for me:

"Poverty is the result of relationships that do not work, that are not just, that are not for life, that are not harmonious or enjoyable. Poverty is the absence of shalom in all its meanings."
"The goal is to see people restored to being what God created them to be: people who understand that they are created in the image of God with the gifts, abilities, and capacity to make decisions and to effect change in the world around them; and people who steward their lives, communities, resources, and relationships in order to bring glory to God. These things tend to happen in highly relational, process-focused ministries more than in impersonal, product-focused ministries."
"A helpful first step in thinking about working with the poor in any context is to discern whether the situation calls for relief, rehabilitation, or development. In fact, the failure to distinguish among these situations is one of the most common reasons that poverty-alleviation efforts often do harm." 
"Development is not done to people or for people but with people." 
"Avoid paternalism. Do not do things for people that they can do for themselves."
"The Bible does not command mindless 'generosity,' but rather the use of wisdom and prudence that keeps the end goal in mind: restoration of people to what they were created to be." 

Favorites:

1) Seeing our South Carolina friends. They truly are some of my favorite people on earth.


Photo by OlinEJ

2) Taking a trip with my parents to see the Ark Encounter and the Creation Museum. My dad has had this on his travel list for a while, so we decided it would be a good time to spring for it. It was cool to travel with just my parents, me, and Raúl. The Noah's Ark replica truly is ginormous, and a lot of the exhibits were very interesting in considering just how sophisticated (for the time), Noahs' set-up for air ventilation, garbage disposal, and feeding could have been. Our favorite thing at the Creation Museum was the 4-D video depicting creation in Genesis and the planetarium video that gave such a crazy visual depiction of just how large the universe is and how small we are by comparison. I'm not sure what the overall purpose of both of these places are--if they are to convince someone who doesn't believe in God or the Bible or creation that those things are real, they may be too cheesy with a lot of creative embellishment and animatronics. For someone who does believe in those things, however, it was a fascinating way of diving into the Bible in a new way and to see a new facet to who God is. Plus, it was just fun to hang around with my parents.

3) Jungle Jim's International Market and trying new food. I heard about his place from a very random MSN article that was about something like "The Most Unique Places You'd Never Think to Go" or something like that. As I think we've established, I love travel, and I love trying new food. This place is a huge, truly giant, international market that has everything from an entire health food/gluten free section to a Korean food section to a Turkish food section to a section entirely for ice creams from around the world. My parents were such good sports in driving an hour from the Ark area to spend hours just letting me walk the aisles to pick up new foods I'd never tried--chocolate-covered marzipan, taro root mochi, kimchi, ugli fruit, dessert cheese, dragon fruit, tajín seasoning, and many others. If you're a foodie, it's so worth going there. My only regret is that I didn't go armed with a food bucket list of things to pick up.


Photo by Kerstin Mais

4) A few hours at Rockaway Beach. It had been years since I'd been to the Atlantic Ocean when Raúl and I took our anniversary trip to New York. I'd also never been to Rockaway Beach. The ocean is my favorite place--when it has waves. There is nothing that calms my soul more than the constancy and grandeur of the ocean. There is nothing that so easily connects me with God's presence. We only had a couple hours to spend here, but it was my favorite part of the entire trip.

5) Time with family. This summer was really rare and completely God-orchestrated. I don't know of what other occasion or time frame all of my siblings, Raúl, and I would've ended up under the same roof for a whole summer, but it was precious time. As the dynamic of our family changes by adding in spouses, it's strengthening to be reminded of the loyalty, kindness, and respect that my family has always had for one another. It was also special watching my family love Raúl well despite the language difficulties and to see him participate in daily life in the US. It's a time that I know we probably won't ever be able to recapture, but it's a time I continuously thank God for.

What have been your favorite things about this summer?

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